Uncategorized

I Slept In For 45 Minutes Once. It Was Terrible.

Have you ever deviated from your child’s nap time routine? I did once. It went a little something like this:

6:45 am: Wake up to find that Hazel is still asleep. I can’t believe it! Joy overcomes me. I’ll just close my eyes and enjoy the next 15 minutes before I go and get her up.

7:45 am: Wake up to hear Hazel cooing in her crib. Shit. Full panic mode. We are 45 minutes behind schedule. What is going to happen to her nap? Will she go to bed tonight? This is a total disaster.

8:00 am: While giving her a bottle I try to see the positive side of the situation. I tell myself to relax. Try to enjoy this, Laura. You WANT her to sleep remember? So what if you’re off track with the routine for one day. It will be fine. Just take your cues from Hazel- she can sleep when she’s tired. Why would you ever wake your child up in the morning?! That’s crazy talk. I find The Baby Whisperer and read up on how to be a relaxed, go-with-the-flow mom.

9:30 am: Screw that hippy bullshit. Things are starting to crumble. All I  can think about is the fact that she is supposed to be asleep from 9:30 to 10. I literally cannot stop myself from looking at the clock and feeling the pang of regret over what I’ve done. She’s supposed to be sleeping right now. I must resist this powerful urge to put her down for a nap.

9:35 am: I’m going to put her down for a nap. I can’t stop myself. We have to try to get back on track.sleep-resistance

(30 minutes of nap resistance) Continue reading “I Slept In For 45 Minutes Once. It Was Terrible.”

Uncategorized

Babes On A Plane: A Horror Story

Last year, I took my 8 month old baby on an 8 hour plane ride to America. The flight out there was during the day, and the return was overnight. Needless to say, we were worried.

I must’ve read 30 different articles titled “Top Tips For Taking Your Baby On A Plane” in preparation for the flight and by the time it rolled around, I felt relatively confident that I could get through the whole ordeal unscathed. Armed with a suitcase full of toys and snacks I boarded American Airlines Flight 1550.

If you were on that flight, you probably remember me as the good-looking, competent, has-her-shit-together mother of the impossibly cute baby.riding-on-planes Continue reading “Babes On A Plane: A Horror Story”

Uncategorized

What Your Baby Carrier Says About You

There are a million baby carriers out there, and a lot of pregnant people ask “What should I look for in a baby carrier?” The answer to this question will reveal itself once you have a child. However, here’s a handy guide that you can use to get started.

The Ergobaby Momergo-mom

Continue reading “What Your Baby Carrier Says About You”

Uncategorized

5 Surprising Ways My Life Changed When I Had A Baby

Blah blah blah I got less sleep and felt a “love like no other”.  Here are a few other ways my life has changed.

1. I’m no longer in any of my own pictures

photos Continue reading “5 Surprising Ways My Life Changed When I Had A Baby”

Funny Stuff

Mom-Bod

The other day I was commenting on how I can’t believe that it’s been almost a YEAR since Hazel was born. In just two short months my little baby will be turning ONE.

Ho. Ly. Cow.

While that’s miraculous and special and wonderful all on its own, this post is about something else- the fact that it’s been a YEAR since my little girl made her way into the world and things aren’t exactly the way I expected them to be. This is true in both the parenting department and also the mom-bod department, but this post is about the latter. I’ll probably regale you with my pearls of parenting wisdom another time. Today it’s all about that ass.

“It takes 9 months to get that way, so it will take at least 9 months to get back to normal” they said. “Don’t worry, you’ll be so busy looking after the baby that the weight will just melt off” they said.

Those little tidbits have not proven true. Turns out you have to do more than sit on the sofa eating bakewell tarts to loose your baby weight.

Not one single pair of my pre-pregnancy jeans fit. I have very few clothing choices that don’t make me feel like a sausage. This is a problem in the UK because the women over here don’t appear to have embraced the leggings trend. It’s called athleisure people. You wear workout clothes as your real clothes because they’re forgiving and they make you look dedicated. Everyone just does it and no one talks about the real reason behind it. For the love of god get on board. Sometimes I really do miss America.

mom-wear
They are killing us over there.

Continue reading “Mom-Bod”

Uncategorized

Must-Have Baby Gear 0-3 Months (Part 2: Everything Else)

So, when you are a new mom sleep is basically the only thing you care about anymore, but there are a few afterthoughts- like your baby’s development and your own sanity- that are also important.

Continue reading “Must-Have Baby Gear 0-3 Months (Part 2: Everything Else)”

Gear · Sleep Obsession

Must Have Baby Gear 0-3 Months (PART 1: SLEEP)

As I mentioned in an earlier post… it’s possible to bring baby home with nothing but diapers and a can-do attitude. Before I had Hazle, I obsessively googled things like “minimalist baby gear” and told myself we wouldn’t be bursting at the seams with baby crap. However, when she didn’t sleep and cried for the better part of the day, I changed my tune. While I admit that my Amazon obsession during those first few months was completely out of control bordered on over the top, there are a few things that I would definitely have on hand should we do the baby thing again. Continue reading “Must Have Baby Gear 0-3 Months (PART 1: SLEEP)”